and God surprises me again

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i’ve mentioned before that our church has 3 different types of services (the main, the edge, and encounter)  we’ve tried the main, and the edge and decided yesterday that maybe we would try encounter.  we had heard it was a little more traditional and we thought as pearl said, “maybe there will be more families/freaks with 6 kids and one income.”  so off we went.  we came in late (always).  and immediately i thought, “maybe we should slip out and go to one of the other services.”  the people were almost all over the age of 50.  most were 60’s and 70’s.  but we hung with it.  we’ve spent some time in a church where most of the members were this age.  so i kinda had an idea what it would be like.  running through the songs.  looking like they’re already as sick of the music as i am.  heaven forbid anybody move.  or stand.  or look like they even want to be there.  and they definitely don’t want you there, especially if you’re new, holding a baby, and sitting in their seat.

and then God surprised me.

i felt like i was sitting in on somebody else’s alone time with God.  i looked around and there were couples with their arms around each other.  people were swaying.  singing.  one woman was signing – not to anybody, just to God.  there was a man who was probably about 75 in a suit with his hands raised.  these people were not doing this, like, in a sensational “look at me” way.  it was worship.  like i’ve never seen.  and there were people of different colors.  and in our area of the south to see elderly people standing alongside others that are different (or at least perceived that way) was incredible.  i cried.  and pearl kept nudging me to look at all of them.  and then they said that we could sit if we needed to (keeping in mind the ages).  and everybody trickled down to sitting.  except one man.  he stood.  and worshipped his God in his way.  my honey said, “now, that’s a strong man.”

and then God surprised me again.

the sermon started.  when they post it on the website i’ll link it here.  and if your computer will allow you to watch it, i’m begging you to watch it.  not because i think you need it, but because it was written straight to me and my struggles this week of feeling poor and forsaken.  you will not believe it.  i didn’t.  i still can’t.  how on earth?  because He wanted me to know that He will not forsake me.  ever.  and because i promised to stand by Him and wait, He was faithful.  He always is. 

and don’t get me wrong.  the message was not one of, “if you just hang in there and do what God wants you to do, it will get better.”  there was no false encouragement.  it was true encouragement.  if we follow what God wants for our family at this time – me staying home, having these babies, and trusting Him – He will use us in His plan.  because there is a plan.  and i want to be in on it.  and i’d rather be doing something for Him than living the big life.  really.  even when it means eating noodles.  so, stay tuned for that sermon.  and when i post it, please, please, please, get alone for a little while and see what God had to say to me sunday.  you won’t believe it. 

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